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Marriage: A Divine Institution in a Fallen World

The marriage ceremony is more than a cultural tradition; it is a divinely ordained institution established by God. As Genesis 2:24 states, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This profound unity reflects God’s design for human relationships, providing a foundation for family, society, and worship. In a world increasingly hostile to biblical values, the Christian marriage ceremony must reclaim its role as a solemn and reverent acknowledgment of God’s sovereignty, purpose, and commands.

The Biblical Foundations of Marriage

The Bible explicitly teaches that marriage was instituted by God in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 2:18-25). It was given before sin entered the world, marking it as part of God’s perfect plan. Jesus affirmed this in Matthew 19:4-6, saying, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” These words underscore the sacredness and permanence of marriage as ordained by God.

The early biblical example of Isaac and Rebekah’s union in Genesis 24:63-67 demonstrates the importance of modesty, submission, and reverence in the marriage relationship. Rebekah’s actions, such as covering herself with a veil, reflect humility and respect, traits often absent in modern wedding culture.

Restoring Reverence in Marriage Ceremonies

The Place and Witnesses of Marriage

Marriage ceremonies in biblical and historical Christian tradition were public, emphasizing the gravity of the vows taken. Malachi 2:14 reminds us, “The Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth.” The public nature of the ceremony ensured accountability and involved the entire community in supporting and upholding the marriage covenant.

Historically, clandestine marriages—secret unions performed without public acknowledgment—were condemned. They undermined the sanctity of the institution and opened the door to deceit and exploitation. As John Donne declared in a wedding sermon from 1621, “Marriage must be done so in public, as that it may have the testimony of men. As marriage is a religious contract, it must be done so as it may have the benediction of the priest.”

Modern elopements and extravagant private ceremonies often miss the biblical purpose of a public witness to the solemnity of marriage. Christian weddings should reflect the principles of accountability, community support, and the acknowledgment of God as the ultimate witness.

Words of Institution: Anchoring Marriage in Scripture

The Christian wedding liturgy historically began with a “word of institution,” grounding the ceremony in the authority of God’s Word. This practice aligns with the example set by Jesus, who used similar introductions in establishing the Lord’s Supper (Luke 22:19-20). The words of institution for marriage remind participants that this covenant is not a human invention but a divine ordinance.

The liturgy often cites marriage’s origin in “man’s innocency,” before the Fall, underscoring that its heterosexual, monogamous nature and permanence were designed by God. As Hebrews 13:4 declares, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” A return to these biblical affirmations is vital in a culture that increasingly redefines marriage to suit human desires.

The Warning Against Carnal Motivations

Christian weddings should include solemn warnings against entering marriage lightly or for selfish purposes. The liturgy reminds couples and witnesses that marriage is not a remedy for lust but a holy covenant requiring mutual commitment, sacrifice, and obedience to God. This aligns with Ecclesiastes 5:5: “It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.”

Too often, modern weddings prioritize sentimentality and personal expression over biblical reverence. While joy and celebration are appropriate, they must be rooted in an understanding of the gravity of the vows made before God.

The Three Biblical Purposes of Marriage

Procreation and Raising Godly Offspring

Marriage is the means through which God fulfills His command to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). Malachi 2:15 emphasizes God’s desire for “godly offspring,” highlighting the responsibility of parents to raise children in “the fear and nurture of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Yet modern culture often minimizes or outright opposes the role of fertility in marriage, even within Christian circles.

Prevention of Sexual Sin

Marriage is also given as a safeguard against sexual immorality. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 7:2, “But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” This purpose underscores the importance of purity and chastity in the marital relationship, which reflects the sanctity of the body as the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Mutual Help and Companionship

The mutual support of husband and wife is a cornerstone of biblical marriage. Genesis 2:18 records God’s declaration, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Marriage provides emotional, physical, and spiritual companionship, enabling both partners to grow in their sanctification.

The Vows: A Covenant Before God

The exchange of vows is the central moment of the marriage ceremony, marking the covenant between husband, wife, and God. These vows, deeply rooted in Scripture, affirm lifelong commitment “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.” The permanence of marriage is affirmed in Romans 7:2: “A married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage.”

Customizing vows for creativity or cultural relevance often dilutes their solemnity. Cranmer’s traditional vows, with their biblical foundations, remain a powerful declaration of covenant love and commitment.

The Role of Obedience in Marriage

Christian marriage liturgies historically included the bride’s promise to “obey” her husband. This reflects the biblical teaching of headship and submission, as outlined in Ephesians 5:22-24: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”

This promise does not imply inferiority but aligns with the God-ordained roles in marriage, fostering harmony and Christ-like leadership.

The Transfer of Authority

The traditional question, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” symbolizes the father’s transfer of authority over his daughter to her husband. This practice, rooted in biblical patriarchy, honors the father’s role as protector and affirms the husband’s responsibility to lead his household in love and obedience to God.

Numbers 30:1-16 provides a biblical precedent for the father’s authority over his daughter’s vows, demonstrating the continuity of this principle throughout Scripture.

Restoring Biblical Preaching in Weddings

The wedding sermon offers an unparalleled opportunity to proclaim God’s design for marriage. Pastors should boldly teach the duties of husbands to love their wives sacrificially and of wives to submit to their husbands with respect (Ephesians 5:25-33). Avoiding these topics for fear of controversy does a disservice to couples and the church.

Conclusion: Reclaiming the Biblical Vision of Marriage

Christian marriage ceremonies must return to their biblical roots, emphasizing the covenantal nature of marriage, its purposes, and its responsibilities. This restoration requires pastors, couples, and congregations to reject cultural compromises and honor God’s unchanging design. As Dietrich Bonhoeffer wisely observed, “It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love.”

Marriage, instituted by God, is not merely a personal commitment but a public witness to His eternal truth. Let every Christian wedding be a testimony to the beauty, holiness, and permanence of this divine institution.

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About the Author

EDWARD D. ANDREWS (AS in Criminal Justice, BS in Religion, MA in Biblical Studies, and MDiv in Theology) is CEO and President of Christian Publishing House. He has authored over 220+ books. In addition, Andrews is the Chief Translator of the Updated American Standard Version (UASV).