How Can You Prepare for a Successful Marriage?

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Marriage is one of the most significant decisions a person can make, and as such, it requires careful planning and preparation. Jesus himself emphasized the importance of planning, particularly when building or establishing something meant to last. In Luke 14:28-30, he said, “For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’” In the context of marriage, this principle of planning is particularly important, as marriage is intended to be a lifelong union. Therefore, proper preparation is vital to ensure that a marriage not only begins well but thrives throughout its duration.

The Bible provides valuable guidance for those planning to enter into marriage, offering practical counsel and addressing key questions that every couple should consider. With this foundation, individuals can ensure that they are spiritually, emotionally, and practically prepared to build a lasting and successful marriage.

Why Is the Bible a Valuable Aid to Those Planning for Marriage, and What Three Questions Will It Help Us to Answer?

The Bible serves as a valuable guide for individuals who are planning for marriage because it offers timeless principles directly from Jehovah, the Creator of marriage. In Genesis 2:24, the institution of marriage was established: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Jehovah’s purpose for marriage is to provide companionship, support, and a means for family life to flourish under His guidance. The Bible helps us understand how to prepare for and sustain a healthy marriage by providing answers to three crucial questions:

  1. What should be the basis of a marriage? The Bible emphasizes that marriage should be based on love, respect, and commitment. Colossians 3:14 states, “And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” This love should be more than romantic feelings; it should be grounded in agape love—the self-sacrificial love that seeks the best for the other person. This ensures that marriage is built on a firm foundation of mutual care and service, rather than mere emotional or physical attraction.
  2. What role does faith play in marriage? The Bible stresses the importance of being “unequally yoked” with an unbeliever (2 Corinthians 6:14). This principle underscores the necessity of shared faith as a foundation for marriage, ensuring that both partners are aligned in their spiritual goals and values. A marriage rooted in faith is strengthened by the couple’s mutual commitment to Jehovah, helping them to weather challenges and grow together in their relationship with God.
  3. How can a couple maintain a successful marriage? The Bible provides practical counsel on communication, forgiveness, and selflessness—all of which are essential for maintaining a healthy marriage. Ephesians 4:32 advises, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” A marriage that thrives is one in which both partners are willing to forgive, compromise, and show empathy, continually seeking to support each other.
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What Is a Vital Factor in Maintaining a Successful Marriage, and Why?

The vital factor in maintaining a successful marriage is the couple’s unwavering commitment to their marriage vows and to each other. This commitment is not based on fleeting emotions or circumstances but is rooted in a solemn covenant made before Jehovah. Ecclesiastes 5:4-5 warns, “When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it… It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay.” The marriage vows represent a promise made to both one’s spouse and to Jehovah, signifying a lifelong dedication to the relationship.

Marriage is not always easy, and couples will inevitably face difficulties, whether financial stress, health challenges, or interpersonal conflicts. However, a strong commitment to the marriage covenant helps both spouses to persevere through these trials. Jesus emphasized the seriousness of marriage when he said in Matthew 19:6, “So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” By viewing marriage as a sacred and permanent bond, couples are motivated to work through problems, seek reconciliation, and grow together in love and respect.

Although the Solemn Commitment of Marriage Frightens Some, Why Should It Rather Be Highly Valued by Those Intending to Marry?

While the solemn nature of marriage may seem daunting to some, it should be highly valued by those who intend to marry because it provides a sense of security, stability, and purpose. In a world where relationships are often treated as temporary or disposable, the biblical view of marriage as a lifelong commitment offers profound reassurance. Malachi 2:16 underscores Jehovah’s view of marriage: “For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel.” This shows that marriage is not something to be entered into lightly, but it is also not something to fear. When approached with reverence and preparation, marriage becomes a source of joy and fulfillment.

The permanence of marriage encourages both partners to invest fully in their relationship. Knowing that their union is meant to last, couples are more likely to work through difficulties and build a strong foundation for their future. This sense of permanence also provides stability for any children that may come from the marriage, offering them a secure and loving environment in which to grow.

Why Is It Best Not to Rush Into Marriage at a Young Age?

The Bible does not specify an exact age for marriage, but it encourages wisdom, maturity, and preparedness before entering into such a serious commitment. Proverbs 19:2 advises, “Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way.” Rushing into marriage without adequate preparation or understanding can lead to unnecessary challenges and regrets.

Young people may be particularly susceptible to the allure of romantic love or the pressure to conform to societal expectations. However, marriage requires emotional maturity, financial stability, and spiritual readiness—qualities that may take time to develop. Proverbs 14:15 warns, “The simple believes everything, but the prudent gives thought to his steps.” Those who take the time to develop themselves, grow in their faith, and understand the responsibilities of marriage will be better equipped to handle the demands of married life.

By waiting until they are fully prepared—emotionally, spiritually, and practically—individuals can enter marriage with a clearer understanding of what it entails and with the tools necessary for a successful and lasting union.

Why Should Those Planning to Get Married Examine Themselves First?

Before entering into marriage, it is essential for individuals to examine themselves and ensure that they are personally prepared for the responsibilities that marriage entails. 2 Corinthians 13:5 encourages self-examination: “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves.” In the context of marriage, this self-examination involves assessing one’s spiritual maturity, emotional stability, and readiness to commit to a lifelong partnership.

Marriage requires a high degree of selflessness, patience, and resilience. Those who enter marriage with unresolved personal issues, emotional baggage, or unrealistic expectations may find it difficult to navigate the complexities of married life. Proverbs 4:23 offers wise counsel: “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” By addressing personal challenges and ensuring that one’s heart is aligned with Jehovah’s will, individuals can prepare themselves to be loving and supportive spouses.

Additionally, self-examination allows individuals to identify areas of personal growth that may be needed before marriage. Whether it’s developing better communication skills, learning to manage finances, or growing in spiritual maturity, taking the time to work on oneself before marriage can lead to a stronger and more harmonious relationship.

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What Counsel Does the Bible Give That Will Help an Individual to Prepare for Marriage?

The Bible provides a wealth of practical counsel for those preparing for marriage, guiding individuals in how to develop the qualities necessary for a successful union. One of the most important pieces of advice is found in Ephesians 5:21, which encourages mutual submission: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” This principle of mutual submission is foundational for a healthy marriage, where both partners are willing to put the other’s needs ahead of their own.

In addition to mutual submission, the Bible highlights the importance of love and respect in marriage. Ephesians 5:33 instructs, “Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” These two qualities—love and respect—are crucial for creating a marriage that is built on trust, care, and mutual support. Love motivates a husband to be kind, patient, and selfless, while respect encourages a wife to honor her husband’s role and support his leadership.

Furthermore, the Bible emphasizes the importance of wisdom in making life decisions, including the decision to marry. Proverbs 24:3-4 teaches, “By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” Wisdom involves carefully considering the qualities and values of a potential spouse, seeking Jehovah’s guidance in prayer, and ensuring that the relationship is built on a solid spiritual foundation.

How May Two People Find Out Whether or Not They Are Compatible?

Compatibility is an important factor in marriage, and the Bible provides principles that can help individuals determine whether they are well-suited for each other. Amos 3:3 poses the question, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to meet?” This Scripture highlights the importance of shared goals, values, and priorities in a relationship.

Couples can assess their compatibility by engaging in open and honest conversations about their beliefs, values, and expectations for the future. Are they aligned in their spiritual goals? Do they share similar views on family, finances, and roles within the marriage? These discussions can reveal whether the couple is compatible in the areas that matter most for a successful marriage.

Additionally, spending time together in different settings—such as attending worship services, participating in ministry, and engaging in social activities—can provide valuable insights into each person’s character and behavior. Proverbs 27:17 states, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” As couples spend time together, they can observe how they interact, resolve conflicts, and support one another, helping them determine whether they are a good match for marriage.

Why Is It Very Unwise to Court Someone Who Does Not Share Your Faith?

The Bible is clear about the importance of spiritual unity in marriage. 2 Corinthians 6:14 warns, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” Marrying someone who does not share your faith can lead to significant challenges, as the couple may have differing priorities, values, and beliefs.

When two people do not share the same faith, they may struggle to find common ground on important issues such as worship, raising children, and handling life’s challenges. This can create tension and division within the marriage, making it difficult to maintain harmony and unity. On the other hand, a couple who shares the same faith is better equipped to build a marriage that is centered on their relationship with Jehovah and grounded in biblical principles.

For this reason, it is crucial for individuals to seek a marriage partner who shares their faith and is committed to serving Jehovah. By doing so, they can ensure that their marriage is built on a solid spiritual foundation and is aligned with Jehovah’s purpose for their lives.

Is Having the Same Faith the Only Aspect of Unity in a Marriage? Explain.

While sharing the same faith is essential for unity in marriage, it is not the only aspect that contributes to a successful relationship. In addition to spiritual unity, couples must also be aligned in other areas of life, such as their values, goals, and communication styles.

Ephesians 4:2-3 encourages believers to “walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” This passage highlights the importance of qualities such as humility, patience, and love in maintaining unity within a marriage. Couples who are aligned in these qualities are more likely to build a strong and lasting relationship.

Furthermore, unity in marriage involves a shared commitment to the relationship itself. Both partners must be willing to invest time, effort, and emotional energy into nurturing the marriage, resolving conflicts, and supporting one another. Philippians 2:4 advises, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” When both spouses are committed to seeking the best for each other, their marriage will be characterized by unity, harmony, and mutual support.

What Might a Man or a Woman Look for When Considering a Prospective Marriage Mate?

When considering a prospective marriage mate, individuals should look for qualities that align with biblical principles and that indicate a readiness for marriage. Proverbs 31:10-11 praises the virtuous woman, saying, “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.” This passage highlights qualities such as trustworthiness, diligence, and faithfulness, which are essential for a successful marriage.

For both men and women, it is important to look for a prospective mate who demonstrates spiritual maturity, emotional stability, and a commitment to Jehovah’s principles. A man should seek a woman who is kind, respectful, and supportive, while a woman should seek a man who is loving, responsible, and willing to lead the family in a Christlike manner.

In addition to these qualities, it is important to consider practical aspects such as compatibility in personality, goals, and values. Philippians 2:3 encourages believers to “do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” A prospective marriage mate who exhibits humility, selflessness, and a willingness to serve others is likely to be a good partner in marriage.

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If Minor Weaknesses Are Perceived During Courtship, What Should Be Borne in Mind?

During courtship, it is natural to observe some minor weaknesses or differences in the other person. However, it is important to approach these weaknesses with a spirit of understanding and forgiveness. Colossians 3:13 advises, “Bear with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgive each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”

While it is important to address any significant concerns or red flags, it is also important to recognize that no one is perfect. Minor weaknesses, such as differences in communication styles or habits, can often be addressed through open and honest conversations. By showing patience and a willingness to work through differences, couples can strengthen their relationship and build a foundation of mutual understanding.

At the same time, it is important to distinguish between minor weaknesses and more serious issues that could impact the success of the marriage. If significant concerns arise during courtship, it is wise to take time to prayerfully consider whether the relationship is truly aligned with Jehovah’s purpose for marriage.

About the author

EDWARD D. ANDREWS (AS in Criminal Justice, BS in Religion, MA in Biblical Studies, and MDiv in Theology) is CEO and President of Christian Publishing House. He has authored over 220+ books. In addition, Andrews is the Chief Translator of the Updated American Standard Version (UASV).

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