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Understanding Biblical Humility
Teaching children humility is an essential aspect of Christian parenting. Humility, as defined in Scripture, is not simply a matter of self-deprecation or low self-esteem; rather, it is a profound recognition of one’s dependence on God and an understanding of our place in relation to Him and others. The Bible frequently extols humility as a virtue that is pleasing to God. In James 4:10, we are instructed, “Humble yourselves before Jehovah, and he will exalt you.” This verse highlights the paradox of humility in the Christian life: those who lower themselves before God will be raised up by Him.
Biblical humility involves acknowledging that all our abilities, talents, and achievements come from God. It is the opposite of pride, which the Bible consistently condemns. Proverbs 16:18 warns, “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Thus, teaching children humility is about guiding them to recognize that their worth and abilities are gifts from God, and that they are to use these gifts in service to Him and others, not for self-glorification.
The Importance of Modeling Humility
One of the most effective ways to teach children humility is by modeling it in the home. Parents serve as the primary example for their children, and the attitudes and behaviors that parents exhibit are often mirrored by their children. If parents demonstrate humility in their own lives, children are more likely to adopt this virtue as well.
Modeling humility begins with acknowledging our own limitations and weaknesses before God. In Philippians 2:3, Paul writes, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” This mindset must be evident in the way parents interact with their children, spouses, and others. When children see their parents prioritizing the needs of others and submitting to God’s will, they learn that humility is not just a concept but a lived reality.
Moreover, modeling humility involves being willing to admit when we are wrong and asking for forgiveness. James 5:16 encourages believers to “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” When parents apologize to their children or others for mistakes, they teach their children that humility includes recognizing one’s faults and seeking reconciliation.
Teaching Humility through Scripture
Another vital component of teaching humility is grounding children in the Scriptures. The Bible provides numerous examples and teachings on humility that can guide children in understanding and embracing this virtue. Parents can incorporate regular Bible study and discussions that focus on humility, using both the Old and New Testaments to illustrate this principle.
One powerful example is found in the life of Jesus Christ, who is the ultimate model of humility. Philippians 2:5-8 describes how Jesus, though He was in the form of God, “did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” This passage teaches children that true humility involves self-sacrifice and obedience to God, even when it is difficult.
Another example is the story of King Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel 4. Nebuchadnezzar’s pride led to his downfall, as God humbled him by taking away his kingdom and reducing him to living like an animal. Only when Nebuchadnezzar acknowledged God’s sovereignty and humbled himself did God restore his sanity and his kingdom. This story serves as a powerful reminder that humility is not optional but necessary for living in accordance with God’s will.
Encouraging Humility in Daily Life
In addition to modeling and teaching humility through Scripture, parents can encourage humility in their children’s daily lives by creating opportunities for them to practice it. This can be done through family activities, service opportunities, and daily interactions that reinforce the value of humility.
For example, involving children in acts of service is a practical way to teach humility. Jesus taught His disciples about humility through service, saying in Matthew 23:11, “The greatest among you shall be your servant.” By serving others, children learn to put the needs of others before their own and to recognize the value of every person as created in God’s image.
Parents can also encourage humility by praising their children when they display humble attitudes and behaviors. This does not mean over-praising them to the point of fostering pride, but rather acknowledging their efforts to serve others or admit their mistakes. Positive reinforcement helps children understand that humility is valued and rewarded by God.
Another way to encourage humility is by helping children understand the concept of stewardship. Everything they have, from their possessions to their talents, is a gift from God, and they are called to use these gifts wisely and for the benefit of others. Teaching children about stewardship helps them see that their lives are not about self-promotion but about honoring God and serving His purposes.
Addressing Pride and Selfishness
As part of teaching humility, parents must also address the natural tendencies toward pride and selfishness that are present in every human heart. The Bible clearly teaches that pride is a sin that separates us from God. Proverbs 8:13 states, “The fear of Jehovah is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.” Therefore, parents must be vigilant in identifying and correcting prideful attitudes in their children.
When prideful behavior is observed, it is important for parents to address it lovingly but firmly. This may involve discussing the consequences of pride as outlined in Scripture, such as the downfall of Lucifer due to his pride (Isaiah 14:12-15) or the fate of Herod Agrippa in Acts 12:21-23, who was struck down by God because he accepted praise as a god rather than giving glory to Jehovah.
Parents can also help their children recognize the dangers of pride by encouraging them to consider the impact of their actions on others. When children understand that pride often leads to hurting others or causing division, they may be more inclined to cultivate humility instead.
Cultivating a Heart of Gratitude
Gratitude and humility are closely linked, as a grateful heart recognizes that all good things come from God and that we are dependent on Him for everything. Parents can foster humility in their children by teaching them to be grateful for the blessings they receive.
Regularly expressing thanks to God in prayer is a practice that can instill humility in children. Philippians 4:6 instructs believers, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” By incorporating thanksgiving into their prayers, children learn to acknowledge God’s provision and develop a humble dependence on Him.
Parents can also encourage their children to express gratitude to others. Whether it is thanking a teacher, a friend, or a family member, showing appreciation for the kindness and support of others helps children recognize that they are not self-sufficient but rely on the contributions of those around them.
Teaching Humility Through Discipline
Discipline is another crucial aspect of teaching humility. The Bible emphasizes the importance of discipline in shaping a child’s character. Proverbs 22:6 advises, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Discipline, when administered with love and consistency, helps children learn the boundaries of acceptable behavior and the importance of submitting to authority.
When children are disciplined for displaying prideful or selfish behavior, they are given an opportunity to reflect on their actions and to learn humility. However, it is essential that discipline is not administered in anger or harshness, as this can lead to resentment rather than humility. Instead, discipline should be seen as a form of loving correction that guides children back to the right path.
Parents can also use discipline as a teaching moment to discuss the biblical principles of humility and submission to God. For example, after disciplining a child, a parent might discuss how the child’s behavior contrasts with the humility that God desires and how they can make better choices in the future.
Encouraging Reflection and Self-Examination
Reflection and self-examination are valuable practices for cultivating humility. The Bible encourages believers to examine themselves regularly to ensure that their attitudes and actions align with God’s will. In 2 Corinthians 13:5, Paul writes, “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test!”
Parents can guide their children in the practice of self-examination by encouraging them to reflect on their day and consider whether their actions were motivated by humility or pride. This reflection can be done during family devotions or before bedtime, providing an opportunity for children to confess any prideful attitudes and seek God’s help in developing humility.
Self-examination also involves recognizing and repenting of sin. When children are taught to regularly confess their sins to God, they develop a deeper awareness of their need for His grace and forgiveness. This awareness fosters humility, as they understand that they are dependent on God’s mercy and cannot rely on their own righteousness.
Fostering Humility Through Worship and Prayer
Worship and prayer are central to the Christian life and are powerful tools for fostering humility. Through worship, children learn to focus on God’s greatness and to acknowledge their own smallness in comparison. Worship reminds us that God is the Creator and Sustainer of all things, and that we are His servants.
Psalm 95:6-7 calls believers to worship with humility: “Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before Jehovah, our Maker! For He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture, and the sheep of His hand.” This act of bowing down in worship is a physical expression of the humility that should characterize our relationship with God.
Prayer is another important practice for developing humility. When children pray, they learn to bring their needs, desires, and concerns before God, acknowledging that they are dependent on Him for everything. In Matthew 6:9-13, Jesus teaches His disciples to pray with the recognition of God’s sovereignty and provision, beginning with the words, “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name.” This prayer sets the tone for humble submission to God’s will.
Parents can encourage their children to develop a habit of regular prayer, teaching them to seek God’s guidance in all areas of life and to submit their will to His. As children grow in their prayer life, they will develop a deeper sense of humility, recognizing that they are not in control of their lives but are reliant on God’s grace and direction.
The Role of the Church in Teaching Humility
The local church also plays a vital role in teaching children humility. Through participation in church activities, worship services, and Sunday school classes, children are exposed to teachings on humility and have opportunities to practice it in a communal setting.
The church provides a context in which children can learn to serve others and to consider the needs of the broader Christian community. In 1 Peter 5:5, believers are instructed, “Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.'” In the church, children learn to respect and submit to the authority of church leaders and to serve their fellow believers with humility.
Church activities such as service projects, mission trips, and fellowship events offer practical opportunities for children to serve others and to practice humility in their interactions. These experiences help reinforce the lessons of humility taught at home and provide a supportive environment in which children can grow in this virtue.
Teaching Humility in a World of Entitlement
In today’s culture, which often promotes entitlement and self-centeredness, teaching children humility can be particularly challenging. The message that individuals should “put themselves first” is prevalent in many aspects of society, from advertising to social media. However, Christian parents must counter these messages by instilling in their children a biblical understanding of humility.
One way to address the culture of entitlement is by teaching children the value of hard work and responsibility. When children are given responsibilities at home, such as chores or helping with younger siblings, they learn that they are not entitled to everything they want and that they must work for what they receive. This lesson fosters humility by helping children understand that their needs and desires are not the center of the world.
Additionally, parents can teach their children to appreciate the efforts and contributions of others. Encouraging children to express gratitude to those who serve them, whether it be a teacher, a coach, or a store clerk, helps them recognize that they are not self-sufficient and that they rely on the work of others.
Finally, parents can help their children resist the culture of entitlement by teaching them the importance of giving. Jesus said in Acts 20:35, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” When children are taught to give generously of their time, talents, and resources, they learn that true fulfillment comes not from accumulating things for themselves, but from serving others and honoring God.
The Reward of Humility
While humility often requires self-sacrifice and a willingness to put others before oneself, the Bible promises that God rewards those who humble themselves before Him. In Matthew 23:12, Jesus teaches, “Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.” This principle is echoed throughout Scripture, affirming that God honors those who choose the path of humility.
Parents can encourage their children by reminding them of the blessings that come from living a humble life. While the world may not always recognize or reward humility, God sees the heart and will reward those who faithfully serve Him in humility. This reward is not necessarily material but is found in the peace, joy, and fulfillment that comes from living in accordance with God’s will.
Furthermore, the ultimate reward for humility is eternal. Jesus promised that those who humble themselves will be exalted in the kingdom of heaven (Luke 14:11). By teaching children to embrace humility, parents are preparing them not only for a successful life on earth but for eternal life with God.
In conclusion, teaching children humility is a crucial aspect of Christian parenting that involves modeling humility, grounding them in Scripture, encouraging humble attitudes in daily life, addressing pride, fostering gratitude, and providing opportunities for service and reflection. Through these efforts, parents can raise children who honor God with their lives and reflect the humility of Christ in all they do.
About the Author
EDWARD D. ANDREWS (AS in Criminal Justice, BS in Religion, MA in Biblical Studies, and MDiv in Theology) is CEO and President of Christian Publishing House. He has authored over 220+ books. In addition, Andrews is the Chief Translator of the Updated American Standard Version (UASV).
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